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You are here: Home / Family Life / The Importance of Putting Your Marriage First

The Importance of Putting Your Marriage First

April 6, 2011 By LaVonne

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Marriage First

Did you know that my husband and I have been married for almost 12 years? It is hard to believe myself. We waited 8 years to have our first child and I remember those days. They are getting a little foggy, but those first years of marriage were pretty great. Of course, we had our rough and bumpy patches but we made it through and we spent a lot of time together and loved doing romantic things.

We enjoyed:

  • dinner out
  • enjoying a local bed & breakfast
  • short trips to the San Juan Islands

Do you remember doing these things when you were first married? I have many great memories of married life pre-baby.

Colossians 3:14: “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

We are Trying for a Second Child

Then, life happens. A baby happens. We are so happy. I mean, how can you have so much love for this little person? Your heart swells and then the baby becomes the center of the family. I know, we SHOULD protect the romantic marriage that we once cherished, but as it happens, we stopped having less dates and “us time.”

Now that the baby is a 3 year old girl, I am realizing that romantic dinners, and weekend excursions MUST be planned. They don’t just happen spontaneously any more. That was the old days. But, I realize now that if I just make plans and a decision, my husband and I could still have those things in our life. Intentional Marriage!

 

Ephesians 4:2-3: “With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”

marriage first

I think that it is important for our marriage to spend quality time together. Though, we often revolve our life around our child now, we need to still focus on us. Relationships take time and communication. When life gets busy, it seems our marriage takes the back seat. That is something I would like to change.

Ideas to Put Marriage First

  • Instead of television or internet in the evening, after our Princess goes to sleep, we can have us time. We can debrief, have dessert, share together. I don’t expect us to do this every night but at least once per week.
  • Plan a date night once per month or once every 2 months. There are times when we are traveling that we don’t know people in the city we are in, we don’t have a baby sitter. So this will have to be done when we are home in between travels.
  •  Plan a weekend trip once per year. Even if it is just a one night trip. We used to love doing this. So I think this one would be the best! I am looking forward to it this summer in fact. I already have ideas of where I’d like to go.

 

Marriage takes time. I love my husband and I think these intentional changes in our life can only improve our marriage. I choose to do this for us.

 

Mark 10:9: “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

 

 

Filed Under: Family Life

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